Moore Family Lately….and Number 7- My Dream Job….'

Well, I've been slacking on writing.  Probably because being awfully sick (Hyperemesis Gravidarum), working full time, vacationing in Mexico, getting ready for the baby and managing a home and a family…I  haven't had much time to write.  I guess I should update y'all on some of the big stuff…

April- in April I went on my Walk To Emmaus, flight 1748and I have to say, it was BY FAR one of the best experiences of my entire life…if you haven't been on one, don't know what it is, or just aren't' sure PLEASE don't hesitate to talk to me about it!  I would be MORE than happy to share some info with you and pray for your chance to go!  Jay sponsored me, which I feel like was a HUGE moral booster for our wedding… as a woman, I know my husband prays for me…but to hear from people that he spent time out of his weekend to sit in a chapel and pray over me was absolutely outstanding to me!  NEVER in my entire life have I felt so overcome by real, selfless love!  Not only was my precious husband praying for me, but total strangers, my family, my friends and my sweet mother-in-law who was on the music team and served me and my fellow pilgrims on our walk.  I cannot even express the amount of overwhelming love I felt between all the women and men involved directly and indirectly with our walk, as well as the overwhelming, unconditional love of our Savior!   I seriously cannot express how amazing the weekend was but I can tell you that I wish I could experience it over and over and over, luckily… I have made some great friends and reliving those feelings are never too far from home!  

May- I can't think of anything extremely exciting about May off the top of my head, except for my baby sister graduating high school!  I am extremely proud of her…but I am a little sad that she'll be taking off for Austin in just a few months to go to UT.

June- Family Vaction!   We spent 8 days and 7 nights in sunny Cancun, Mexico with my family and I have to say, there is nothing a little bit of salt water and sand can't cure!  Jay, Jaxon and I enjoyed lots of time on the beach, and at the pool.  We spent some time snorkeling, riding around Cozumel, and Isla Mujeres.  It was a LOT of fun.  

July- My little Jaxy turned a whole 2 years old on the second!  I cannot believe how big he is and how much fun he has become!  His vocabulary has expanded immensely, and he's become quite the baseball and football fan.  In fact, there's not a sport he doesn't love.  He enjoys anything with a ball to be real honest.  He's become a big fan of riding around in Daddy's "beep" (jeep), and carries his fishing pole all over the house.  He's been camping out in the living room playing in his tent since his birthday and thinks that begging for cake for breakfast is going to eventually mean I'm going to give in.  He still loves to talk about the baby and his new signature phrase is "awe, how tuuute" (Awe, how Cute!)  He kisses my belly every chance he gets and loves to rub it when we're laying around trying to sleep…I guess he's decided I'm starting to look like Buddha?!   Speaking of…little M2 (which is the nickname I've given this baby until he are for sure we've got baseballs or bows coming around) we hit 19 weeks today…. he or she is the size of a mango!   I'm starting to become closer to the size of a house (or so it feels)  I changed up my schedule at work to be part time for now…I was super sick for the first 18.5 weeks with this pregnancy and ended up in the ER for dehydration… thank God for Zofran! Luckily, I'm feeling better.  Jaxon starts Joy School at Glen Meadows in the Fall and I am SO excited for him to have the opportunity to spend two days a week with other kids his age learning and playing!  I know it will be a great thing for both of us!  As of right now, I'll be working the night before he goes to Joy School and then he'll attend Joy School for half a day while I try to grab a few Z's.  

and well, since I've given a little update, I guess I'll continue with my 30 Things my Kids Should Know About Me 

Number 7 is a post about my dream job…I know, I know, I ALWAYS waste a few minutes of your time telling you how hard it is for to write certain things and then they just flow…but to be honest…this is a hard post for me…I'm a Nurse by education, and skill (or something like that) but I am a Mother by nature… therefor to pick my dream job feels like I have to choose to do one more than the other…not to mention, since I've been a nurse, I've struggled with figuring out exactly WHAT my next career move will be.  While I enjoy more "med-surge" nursing, it's not what I want to do for the rest of my life.  But, I don't really know what I want to do for the rest of my life….so here goes my post before I ramble anymore….

My Dream Job….well…. to be honest, when I started studying to become a nurse I wanted to be a pediatric oncology nurse, or a NICU nurse, and then I started falling in love with Labor and Delivery…and then it was midwifery…and then it was Nursery, and now it's NICU, Pedi, Nursery and L&D… to be honest, I think being a midwife is my dream job…If I could do ANYTHING in the world, I would without a doubt travel the world doing a doctor's without borders program to take care of women all over the world.  But, maybe trauma and ER medicine in the military would be my other dream job.  Or…maybe…. my dream job would be becoming a freelance photographer and traveling the world and walking in War Zones to create historical images for the future generations to learn from.  I might even find my dream job in becoming an anchor on The Today Show…but lets face it…of all those things, very few are probably ever going to happen.  Fortunately, there was a "dream job" I dreamed of before I ever even knew what a stethoscope, or SLR, or The Today Show were. I wanted to be a Mom before any of those things.  When I was little I remember stuffing baby dolls into the bottom of my shirt and pretending I had a baby growing in my belly that I would get to play mom to.  I remember loving, holding and clothing these tiny baby dolls and dreaming of the day, that I would FINALLY be a "real" Mom.  To say I was obsessed, might be underestimating my passion for being a "mom".  When I was 4 or 5 I started dreaming of weddings, and houses, and children.  I wanted to be a "stay at home mom" and I wanted to have a handsome husband and lots of little babies to take care of.  So maybe…of all the wild dreams I've dreamed…being a Mom and a wife is my true Dream Job.  Growing up my "what I want to be when I grow up answer included EVERYTHING from Astronaut, to musician, to Lawyer, to Doctor, to fireman, to race car driver, to oil field worker, to teacher…and the  list goes on and on…but one thing I never stopped wanting to become was a Wife and Mom.  Luckily, I got to become both of those things at the young age of 22.  I get to live my dream job everyday.  Luckily, I also get to be a nurse and take care of all kinds of people.  I get to live my dream job, and have a career.  I can't tell you that I wouldn't love to be on stage singing to a crowd full of people, or delivering babies in Africa, because I would love to do those things, but there's no way I would trade being Mrs. Jay Moore and your Mom for a chance to do ALL those things in the world.  That's what makes being your Mom and your Dad's best friend my dream job.  Maybe it's not a job because I love what I do…but maybe it is a job because I'm constantly cleaning up after you little monkeys!  Thanks for letting me live my dream.  I couldn't be more blessed!

Until Next Time,
Peace, Love and Jobs.

Three wishes

6. If you could have three wishes, what would you wish for?

  So I'm finally getting back on schedule with my "30 things my Children Should Know about me". This one is about my three wishes.  A part of me wanted to selfishly pick three superficial, materialistic wishes that were completely irrelevant to the real world because let's face it, sometimes, having to be a grown up with real responsibilities is a little too tough. Wishes to me, are kind of like unicorns.  They're just kind of mythical.  But that makes me sound like a cynical old woman that doesn't believe in magic.   Needless to say this is a hard post for me to write about because I don't know what I want to say about this... But here's my attempt my sweet children.  

      1. I wish for a home for you that is warm and inviting, safe and full of happiness.  A place that we will spend countless nights laughing, playing and making the most priceless memories.  I wish for a place that you will fill with your friends and fun.   I wish for a place that your dad and I will live for decades to come and that you will someday fill with our future grandchildren.   I want a home that's forever.   I moved around more than I want y'all to move and when I think about "home" there are memories spread out all over Kermit and San Angelo. In the event that you ever lose your dad or I, I hope you can find solace in the place we called home, as a family. 

 2. I wish for you, the faith to move mountains.  Kids, I'm a worrier, and a warrior.  But mostly a worrier.   I hope that you inherit the faith that is bigger than your problems that your dad so wonderfully embraces.   I hope that you never doubt gods plan for your life and that you always week him, and his plan.   I hope you never have to worry and that you always have someone to comfort your fear, both in God and in us.   I hope that you always always remember you have a mighty god on your side.  

3.  I wish for an innocent and fulfilled childhood.  Years of silliness, and precious precious time of being a child.  I wish that I could always protect you from everything bad, scary or ugly and that you would only know of love, joy and fun.   I know that it's not possible, and I know that the trials you face in life will help you to become strong resilient adults but part of me wishes you could stay little forever.   


My wishes are probably pretty common for moms but for me they're what my heart longs for.  


Until next time, 

Peace , love and shooting stars.  

Kayla 

Jaxon's Getting a Fishing Buddy!

 Well, I've been slacking in my "30 things my Children Should Know About Me" posts but I promise to finish all 30…eventually…. but for now I have some VERY exciting news to blog about.  Jaxon is going to be a big brother in November!  We are all nothing short of elated to be adding to our little family! Since I am working at the hospital on the other side of town, and not at the hospital where Jaxon was born I was forced to start looking for a different OB.  Through some conversations with a friend I came across Kelly Miller, CPM,  a traditional midwife that does home births.  Jay and I started a conversation I never imaged having.  I had researched the rising cesarean rates, and the extensive interventions that increase the risk during Nursing school and had very strong feelings about them; but I never felt like home births were "safe".  To be honest, they just sounded too "granola" or too "hippie" for me.  When Jay and I began the conversation about home births someone had suggested a Ricki Lake documentary called "The Business of Being Born" (you can find it on Netflix). As Jay and I watched it, my excitement was far too much to contain.  There were so many questions I had answered, and so much I didn't know about traditional midwifery that was presented to me clear as day.  Needless to say, its definitely one of my favorite documentaries to date.

    The following day, I called Kelly and talked to her about booking a consultation so that we could get answers to the questions we compiled so that we could make a decision, together, about what kind of care we would be seeking.  When we went to our consolation, we were kindly greet by Kelly, Lauren, and Sherri; our Midwife, her student and her assistant (respectively).  They all three listened to my excessive questions, and answered them with so much patience, and compassion.  I was really excited to see a waiting room almost completely dedicated to a kids play area. (If you've ever taken a child to a doctor's appointment other than their own, you understand how nice it is to see an office that is kid friendly!).  After some deliberation Jay and I decided that this was 100% the direction we wanted to take with this pregnancy.  From that moment on my head has been stuck in a book, or I've been glued to documentaries and research to educate myself to the best of my ability.  There are so many things that I think our generation, and our society doesn't know about midwifery and since its been something I have been considering getting my MSN in, what better way to learn than to completely immerse myself in it.  

     I am hoping that this blog will educate people, and to shed some light on something that people aren't very open to talking about.  I don't think that every family should choose water and or home births, but I do feel that women should feel empowered to choose the labor and delivery experience they want.  Over the next few months I plan on sharing some information, my experiences and maybe some links to readings, videos etc… but until then I just want to share about my first appointment.  

     I have to say, that when I was pregnant with Jaxon, my appointments never took less than 3 hours…every single time I went.  My first appointment with Kelly was scheduled at 4:00, and in true Kayla fashion, I was 15 minutes early.  By 4:00 my appointment was underway.  Jaxon had fallen asleep in the car on the way, and they laid out a mat and brought me a blanket for him.  I was instructed to do a routine UA (urine analysis), I weighed myself, and a physical exam was completed.  No pelvic exam!  (if you're a woman you know how uncomfortable that situation is).  We talked about NORA Tea, (which I promise to share some information on once I start actually brewing and drinking mine) and nutrition, as well as exercise and my history.  It was all conducted in the presence of my midwife (the student did most of the "work" which I am totally all for, but never once was my midwife out of the room!) Many of you know that when you see an OB, your nurse does 99% of the work and you spend maybe 15 minutes with your OB.  I loved my previous OB and would have chosen her again if I had the opportunity but it wasn't an option.

    Since making my decision I have encountered lots of skeptics and people that think that I'm making an ignorant decision, but I fully believe in the human body and a woman's ability to give birth naturally.  I feel like labor and delivery is something that a woman should DO and participate in, not have done to her.  I completely understand that cesareans are necessary sometimes but the fact that our local hospitals have a 40% rate of cesareans is alarming.  Women all over the world give birth in their homes, and naturally.  America has the highest rate of c-section and infant mortality and some part of me doesn't wonder if the correlation exists.  We have taken something so natural and made it too synthetic.  When I had Jaxon, despite the fact that I was progressing perfectly and was in active labor, they started me on Pitocin.  I wasn't happy about it and it's definitely not something I want to go through again.  I have heard labor and delivery nurses laugh about and ridicule women who bring in extensive birth plans.  I hated the fact that I spent a maximum of 30 minutes with my baby and then he was whisked away to be bathed by a stranger, when I am perfectly capable of bathing him and was up for the adventure.  None of those things will happen in my home birth and I couldn't be more thrilled.  I hope that this opens up the doors of communication and education for everyone thats even had a slight glimmer of curiosity of home births.  I am open to answering any and all questions and I hope to share the wealth of knowledge I have gained!  


Until Next Time, Peace, Love and Ina May Gaskin!

Kayla Moore

Day 5- 5 Things That Make Me Most Happy

     Sometimes, the reminder of what makes us truly happy in life, comes from when we almost take those things for granted…lately, I feel like I have taken some of my biggest blessings for granted.  That's a really hard statement for me to make, and one I'm definitely not proud of  having felt that way and it's something I wish I never had to admit to anyone in the world.  I'm a Mom, having an audience when I need to potty is supposed to be hilarious.  It's not, but I know someday you'll be a big stinky junior high boy who won't even let me step foot in your bathroom if you're within a 50 ft radius… so I hate to wish way the days that you're little enough to constantly want to play the flushing game (Jaxon, this is by far your favorite obsession lately…you love to flush the potty over…and over…and over…and over and over again!  Happiness is something that is so hard to explain… there's actually a song that really makes me feel what true happiness feels to me when I listen to it… you can watch the You Tube Video right here! With that being said, tonight as I listen to your tiny snores as you lay wrapped in the arms of you loving Daddy I can say that I have never felt more truly happy than I do now… so here's my list.
 

     One) The quiet of our House late at night. - There's something about laying down at night and hearing the sounds of crickets outside, the faint barking of the dogs in the neighborhood, the snores that play like the sweetest symphony in the world in our room at night (You, Dad, Ranger and Ace make a perfect quartet).   The thought of laying in this big king bed and knowing that when I wake up in the morning I'm going to wake up to wet puppy dog kisses, a very snuggly little guy thats going to want to do the Hot Dog Dance at least 10 times a day makes me realize how truly blessed I am, and that makes me so happy.

     2) Park Days- there is something so magical about taking you (Jaxon) to the park, there is so much joy in your giant belly laugh when you go down the slide or swing with me in the swings.  My favorite is when we're the only ones there and we can walk up and down the river hand in hand and talk about the ducks, and the fish, and the water. Playing, exploring and just being with you makes me happy…and when you're happy doing those things, my heart overflows with joy.

   III) Fishing, Baseball, and Hunting- I honestly believe that when God picked out your Papa to be my Dad, he knew that there was going to be a little girl that would love all the things that were supposed to be "for little boys"  but those things makes me a very happy girl.  I can honestly say I don't think I've ever been unhappy in a boat, a blind or a ball park.  My hands always feel completely full and confident if they're holding a rod and reel, a gun, or cheering on the Texas Rangers.  Being a boy mom means that my life will be filled with these things and luckily they're some of your Dad's favorite too.

  Quartro)   Nature-   There is one place in the world that I can honestly say makes my heart feel so overwhelmingly full that it could burst, and thats on the beaches of Mexico with my toes in the sand and the most gorgeous water you've ever seen splashing at my feet.  Traveling in general makes me happy but Mexico has become a very special place to me.  The sun, the sand, the water, the people, the culture, everything about it makes me happy.  Another part of nature that makes me overwhelmingly is a perfect sunrise.  There's something absolutely breath taking about the serenity of a gorgeous sunrise.  They are always quiet and still and a true breath of fresh air.

F.I.V.E)   Being a part of a family-  There is something so special about being a part of a family (especially being a wife, and mother) that makes me so happy.  Or maybe, its everything about being a part of a family that makes me happy.  I grew up with a relatively small family, but since marrying your Dad my family has grown at an exponential rate. I love the fact that I adore your Jojo and Grandad and having a close relationship with them reminds me of how truly truly blessed we are.  I love being a Mommy and a wife, i love being an aunt, and a sister-in-law and having a huge family full of Moore's and Abbott's and Watkins, and Brown's.  I love being apart of something that is so much stronger than I could have ever imagined being a part of. 

     These are only 5 things that make me most happy right now but I hope that you understand that being happy is a choice.  There are always going to be things in your life that make you feel "unhappy" and situations that are less than desirable but I hope that you can always find 5 things that make you most happy right now….focus on those and you'll never go wrong!

Until Next Time,

Peace, Love and Choices 

Dear 16 Year Old Me….

     So for Day Four of this "'Thirty Things My Kid(s) Should Know About Me" is to write 10 things I would have told my 16 year old self…. This should be pretty interesting because 16 year old me…was pretty silly….(PS If you're lost as to what this 30 Things "thing" is check out the original post HERE!   I hope you are all enjoying this hysterical attempt to teach my kid(s) about the "real" me…the Me that existed prior to them blessing my everyday…so here goes nothing!
   

      Dear 16 Year Old Kayla,
           If I had to guess this is the Valentine's Day you spent sitting on your couch, watching some Chick Flick and eating Chinese take out… Congratulations on loving yourself enough to do it with pride… next Valentine's Day isn't going to be the best…in fact…it'll be the first time that you'll truly have your heart broken and it'll happen the morning of, when you're expecting some sweet call from the boy I wish I could save you from…but since I can't (and lets face it…now that I'm grown up and I know how much I've learned from this situation I know I couldn't let you skip the life lesson, sorry…kinda…) I will tell you that 1) your first love…isn't going to be your lifetime love.  That's not your fairy tale, and there's going to come a time when that boy tells you that you AREN'T a Princess and that you DON'T deserve a fairytale ending.  Before you feel like someone has stabbed you in the heart, when that day comes remember; that you are far more precious than rubies, and the keeper of the stars will bless you with a story that is far better than anything any fairytale could create.
     I guess this situation kind of brings me to number 2) Don't have a boyfriend in High School.  Yes, I know, from homecoming to Tri-Hi-Y to  Prom there's some validation in securing a date…but don't get too serious with anyone.   (Oh and PS… that stupid senior boy you recently broke up with…grows up to be an even bigger dork than he was in high school…congrats).  Spend these three years of high school going to football games, and pep-rallies.  Enjoy student council. and your girlfriends. Go watch the guys at Wall play (spoiler alert…you're going to marry one of them…and it's not the one you think!) Savor the nights spent in Shay's cotton fields…and for Christ's sake Kayla…stop thinking James Varnadore hates you… he's going to become one of you most cherished friends in about 4 years..and sadly enough, he gets called home far far far too early.   Enjoy the company of Cassie, Maddie, Sarah, Christie, and Jamie..but remember…that someday you will all grow up and grow apart be glad that you learned from your friendship with them and hold dear the sweet memories. As for boys, you're exactly in the place you should be, being called everyone's little sister.
     Speaking of little sisters, here's number 3) Hold onto every second with Karlee and Kourtney.  Someday, Kourtney isn't going to need you to take her to school every morning, and she's definitely not going to want you to jam out to Taylor Swift with her.   You're going to bawl your eyes out the first time she goes to Proms (you're also going to be about 8 months pregnant! eek!)  Karlee is going to end up being your very VERY best friend.  I know…crazy huh?!  You're not going to want to strangle her forever  all the time.  When you move off to go to college, you're going to miss them a lot…so have as much fun with them while you can…you'll never get to live with them again.
     4) Speaking of College…you're gonna go to Texas Tech… you're going to love it, but your first year is going to be one of the roughest years of your life.  You're going to lose a couple of people that are very very near and dear to your heart…and you're going to meet a roommate that you might think you'll never get along with…but she'll end up being one of your sweetest friends.  Don't spend every weekend in San Angelo.  Dump your boyfriend before you go off to college (he's going to be a total buzz kill, and it's way too much drama).   I wish I could tell you to not come back from Tech after your first year…but everything happens for a reason.  I just wish you had enjoyed it to the fullest, and actually gave it more of a chance.
     5) That boy I told you about in the first paragraph is going to absolutely rip your heart out your first year of college… DO NOT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES OVER AND OVER… if there is ANYTHING I wish you had know 16 year old self, its that there are things in this life that you should not attempt twice…one being dating the same person more than once…and another being sushi (you're NEVER going to like it, not from the Tech SUB, not from Nakamura, not from Shogun…you're never going to like it so give it up.
     6) You're going to go to Nursing school…stop wasting your time fiddling around with Physical Therapy School and majoring in Education…you're wasting your time and your money (but it actually works out because you get to get your BSN from ASU, and thats a brand new program!)  Just study and work hard…you're gonna be successful and you're going to be a nurse!  Yay you!  Oh and as for school…revel in all of Mr. Price's biology fun…he's definitely one of the most amazing teachers you'll ever have…and next year when you have Mrs. Sheldon for Chemistry…you're going to feel like a complete nerd because you're going to absolutely LOVE it!
     7)  Don't get out of the habit of working out…and don't quit golf for theater.  Yeah, you're gonna enjoy theater…but Golf is actually something you're going to do for the rest of your life…your future husband really enjoys it…and he's eventually going to convince you to play when you're huge pregnant.  Don't worry…he'll carry your clubs for you! Don't give up a lot of the things you feel like you need to give up…in fact keep doing EVERYTHING you can…until you can't anymore…because you really really spread yourself thin…and you're not going to stop until you're well into your 20's…its a bad habit but you'll actually learn to love it.
     8) speaking of love… please don't forget to love yourself.  Remember to see past the media, people at school, people that try to bring you down, and the desire to impress boys, friends and the outside world.  Your heart is held by the big man up stairs and you're gonna be just fine…don't lose sight of who you are…and definitely don't give up who you are in order to "make" someone love you…they're not going to love you anyways…
     9) Go ahead and start watching Baseball even though you don't have anyone to watch it with yet.  You're to end up LOVING it, your even one of those girls that knows the entire Rangers Roster, stats AND keeps up with big name players from other teams.  Theres gonna come a day when Opening Day is a celebration in your cute little home and your first child will even have to dress up for the occasion while you have a picnic of hot dogs and chips in your living room floor (you're actually gonna be a pretty cute little momma!)
    10) Don't let anything in life bring you down too far.  Enjoy everything you face with the knowledge that if things didn't work out EXACTLY the way they're mean to, you wouldn't be where you are today…or in 10 years.  you're beautiful and you're so so special!  High school isn't going to be the best years of your life, and neither is college but everyday of your life is going to be special in its own way.  Hold tight to every second..you're only going to get so many.

     16 year old me and 24 year old me are so much a like and so different but 16 year old me was so so so clueless about life… Kid(s) I hope you realize that at 16 you won't have all the answers, and you won't at 24 either…but trust me when I try to be there for you in High School… life goes on



Until Next Time…

   Peace Love and Lettermans

Day 3- Relationship with my Spouse

     Well, I missed a day because I was a little preoccupied with taking my State Boards for my Registered Nurse Licensing…what a stressful and absolutely exhausting ordeal!
    Anyways, I'm back home and a little less exhausted so I figured I would start on Day 3 which reads,  "Describe your relationship with your spouse. " Which is an interesting one because I've never really had to describe our relationship (well except for once, and since I was pretty surprised by the question I said…well, umm we're married….)  Not really very eloquent, huh?!   So maybe today I will be able to do a little better….I'm never afraid to give it a shot!   

     
     So, I guess I should probably give you some background information about How I Met Your Father, (since HIMYM is about to go off the air, if anyone wants to suggest that I write a new television series, at least I can spin off of one of the greatest shows to hit prime time TV since Friends.  (and on a side note, Jay and I are actually quite similar to Marshal and Lilly, and we even have our very own Ted….We even used to have our very own Robin, and I can't really say we have a Barney….) Regardless, I guess I just started describing my relationship with your Dad, with out even introducing how we met…(and you'll probably never watch HIMYM when you get older so that was pretty pointless)  End Rabbit Trail Here.
     
     Ok, ANYWAYS.  I was 13. Your Dad was 15 and we both so happened to be at the San Angelo Relays (I hope you get to compete in them in High School).  The San Angelo Relays are one of the bigger track meets hosted in the area and it was no surprise that your Dad was there (he was almost as good in Track as he was in football in my opinion).  I was there with my friend who was "dating" a guy on your Dad's track team.  Well like all West Texas Springs, the temperature went from a nice 70's day to about a 50 degree evening and I was freezing cold and had borrowed a letterman jacket from the boy my friend and I had gone to watch compete.  Well, after a while we were walking around when your Dad, (mind you, he was already almost 6 ft tall and pretty intimidating  good looking) comes and taps me on the shoulder and all but accuses me of stealing the letterman jacket I was wearing.  I was pretty mortified…and kinda sorta  freaked out and excited that this cute older boy was talking to me.   But, I never really talked to him again until a couple of years later…fast forward about 2 years…. Your Dad and I both went to Youth at Glen Meadows Baptist Church.  He was much cooler than he had been at 15, and had a girlfriend that was always super super sweet to me.  After church we would all go to Rosa's and hang out…and eventually that lead to our group of friends growing over the years.   
      When I got to High School, your dad was a senior, at Wall and I was a Sophomore at Central. Just about every weekend of the next three years of my life, were spent in Wall hanging out with your Uncle Cory, Shay, and your Dad.  Over those three years your Dad and I became really really good friends. He always jokes that he realized I was the girl he wanted to marry when my friend Mark brought him to my house and asked me to make some sandwiches and I sweetly obliged.  During those 3 years your Dad and I both dated other people, but always seemed to be each other's shoulder to cry on. It wasn't always easy being friends with each other, but no matter what we were always there for each other.  About the time I moved off to College your Dad and I had kind of lost touch… over the next few years we seemed to be rare acquaintances rather than best friends. 
     Fast forward to July of 2010.  I was living in Lubbock, working as a Nanny and preparing to go back to Tech to finish school.  I had gone to San Angelo and had hoped to meet up with your Dad, but unfortunately we didn't get to see each other. He "facebook" messaged me a couple of days later and then decided he needed to have a serious conversation with me.  He told me that he had always been in love with me and was hoping to see if I might take a chance on him….greatest decision I ever made.  I moved back to San Angelo that summer, and started school at ASU.  By September, I knew your Dad and I would be getting married soon.  By March he had Proposed, and we were married in October of 2011.    
      While you're probably thinking that was a long story and had nothing to do with what this post was supposed to be about, I can tell you, you're wrong.   In order for you to understand the relationship I have with your Dad you have to realize where we started.  Kid(s), your dad, is my VERY best friend in the whole entire world.  He has taught me so much over the past 11 years!  He has never excluded me from the things he loves, we hunt, fish, and watch sports together.  He has supported me and helped me grow and evolve into a wife and a mother.  He is the leader of this household.  He has ALWAYS reminded me to lean on God and my faith when times get hard, and in return, he has taught me to lean on him.  Before I dated your Dad, I was a stubborn, independent, self sufficient gal.  I had been hurt a lot in the past and I had a really hard time trusting people, but your Dad took his time and proved to me that I could depend on him.  He always tries to protect me, encourage me, and be there for me.  He's quite the guy kid(s), but I'm sure y'all already know that.  He's kind, hardworking, and always laughs at my silliness.  I think thats my favorite part of my relationship with your Dad… he makes me laugh and laughs with me when I'm just being really REALLY silly.   He always goes along with my random escapades.  Whether its dancing in the kitchen when I'm cooking, or making a pallet of pillows and blankets and the air mattress for movie night in the living room…  
       Your Dad does a lot of the stuff that the media tells you is part of being a good husband; holding my hand in the car, opening car doors for me, carrying in the groceries, and bringing me soup when I'm sick…sometimes when he knows I'm really upset with him, he even brings me flowers!  But, he's also a real man that has flaws.  He sometimes forgets to get me a birthday card, or lets Valentine's Day slip by…but thats life.  Sometimes I'm too tired to have a hot meal waiting for him to eat when he comes home, or I forget to make his breakfast before work… but we forgive each other and love each other everyday! 
     Truth is, we've always had a lot of fu together…ever since we became friends.  But, in the past few years we've done a lot of growing up (I've kind of had to kick his butt in gear, but your Dad is WAY more laid back then me.)  We've gotten married, had Jaxon, bought a house, started working on making that house our home, had a career change (Dad) and a career beginning (Mom, after I graduated College, which I couldn't have done without your Dad).  We've learned a lot about life, ourselves, each other, being parents, and about how priceless our family is.  Your Dad and I's relationship is probably something I can't really put into words…sometimes, I don't know how to explain it myself.  We had a close family friend come up to us weeks before our wedding just gushing about how much she could tell we were in love and how "meant to be" we are.  I still think your Dad is my soul mate (even though when you grow up I'm hoping you realize that even marrying your soul mate means having to work a marriage).  I love that he and I got to give a part of us to you… that's why I love you (all) so much!  You have a good mix of all of your Dads great qualities, a lot of mine, and a few of our favorite bad habits.  We probably won't ever be perfect role models for how marriage, and life are "supposed" to be but I hope we can guide you to see what marriage and life can be when you nurture and invest in your relationship.

Until Next Time, 

Peace, Love and Holding Hands 

My Three Fears

Day 2 is to "Describe three legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears"

While yesterday seemed to be "fun" and light, this almost seems like something I really don't want to write about, but what kind of "writer" only talks about the good, the fun and the silly (well I wish the answer was ME! but unfortunately I am gonna "play by the rules on this one")   I guess most importantly I want my kid(s) to know that regardless of my fears, I hope that they see that I live my life in spite of fear.  I hope to never let fear control me, or bring me down.   Fear is probably the ugliest four letter word in my blog.  (Hey! I try to keep it tactful around here).   So here are my three fears.



1. Failing
2. Losing my Loved Ones
3. Disappointing People 


I guess these are probably pretty common fears.  Maybe not in this order, but I don't think that these are pretty normal fears for mom's, dads, adults. and just the entire human race to some extent share these fears with me… so I guess let's break it down.  How did these become my fears….


Failure-   Reading that word just makes me shudder.  My entire life I have felt the need to strive to be the Best mediocrity was NOT acceptable…I have always felt that I had something to prove.   I have always taken way too much stock into other people's opinions of me.  I admit it.  The minute I found out I was pregnant (with Jaxon) was exciting and amazing, but not two seconds after I found out my mind started racing to all the ways I could fail as a parent…as a mother…as a Nursing Student (yes, my sweet child, I selfishly thought that because I was pregnant with you, that I would fail out of Nursing School and would "fail" as an all around person at that point) and devastation set in. How was I, this clueless 22 year old "girl" supposed to raise a child. How was I supposed to maintain being a good wife, and a good student and how was I going to teach a little man to be respectful, god-fearing, and responsible.  I cried and cried to Jay… I felt like I was just opening the door to failure at that point.  Luckily, that fear of failure has pushed me to work harder, to strive more, and to look for help more often. Yes!  I'm telling you that ASKING FOR HELP despite your pride, is a great way to avoid failing, and let me tell you another secret… failure is not determined by not doing something right, or getting a bad grade, or "not passing" a class, or a semester or whatever… it's not being cut from the team, or not being the top of your class, or making a mistake… failure is refusing to try, giving up on something you're passionate about, and not working hard for what you want.  There are going to be things you can't obtain in life, but that does not make you a failure.  I hope that I never fail you my sweet baby, truth is, I may make mistakes (because I am human, and a far-from-perfect one at that) but I will not ever give up on you.  I will fall on my face a million times before I call myself a failure as your mother.

Losing my Loved Ones- Like I mentioned, I don't think that its uncommon for people to fear losing their loved ones.  It's terrifying, mind crippling, and heartbreaking (and unfortunately my child, you too will lose someone you love.)  I wish that there was a way that we would never have to be separated from the people we love.  But the truth is, that at some point in our lives, our earthly journey ends, and our eternal one begins… while you may lose that loved one here on Earth, I hope you learn to rejoice in the opportunity to meet with them again.  Don't ever let the fear of  loss keep you from falling in love, don't let it build up walls in your heart, or make you bitter, angry or mean.  Live every moment for what it is, build wonderful priceless and unforgettable memories with the people that you love so that they are never really lost.  They may not be here in flesh, but I promise you, if you truly love someone, they will always be in your heart.

Disappointing People- Kid(s), I am writing this at the prime age of 24 years old… and I can tell you right now, that I have disappointed SO many people in my life…. one I can think of in particular is your Papa (my Dad) he is the one person in this world that no matter how old I am, I hope that I don't disappoint him…but truth is, I'm human.  But, you know what… disappointing him never made him love me less, and it never made him not believe in me…and I hope that you will also know that even if something you do disappoints me (like reaching the marker out of the junk drawer this morning and coloring on my couch this morning) I will never love you less, or give up on you… I will teach, correct, and help you move on…

I guess I can't tell you why these are my fears anymore than I have, or how they become fears except for that's who I am…I am a little bit of a people pleaser, and I deeply care what other people think of me (I hope you inherit thick skin from your dad and learn to be unaffected by other people's opinions, but that you still have enough sense to be tactful, respectable and hardworking)  I take a lot of pride in my accomplishments and in myself (unfortunately that is also a downfall of mine) but I know that God has provided me with these tasks so that he can be glorified… I know that right now…your fears are the dark, too many kisses from the puppies, and mommy and daddy having to leave you with a sitter…and I wish that you could stay little forever so that your fears were never any bigger than that, but you have to grow up.  When you do, I hope that you feel that you can always talk to me about your fears, and we can battle them together. I love you, and I hope that I teach you that there is nothing to fear, but fear it's self….


Until Next Time,

Peace, Love and Overcoming Fears.

Thirty Things My Kid(s) Should Know About Me….

So, recently on one of my Pinterest "binges" I found a site sharing 30 blog prompts that are geared towards parents sharing some information about themselves with their children.  It actually even suggests making a book out of the entries…Which I think is actually a pretty cute idea.  One of my biggest fears is not having left something for my children (no matter how young) to know who I was, not only as their Mom, but also as a person.  So here are my 30 Things My Kid(s) should know about me in 30 days.   Big shout out to the wonderful lady that wrote these blog prompts to share with us… you can start your own 30 day journey here…. Click Here and Join the Fun :)

Here's the List :
1. List 20 random facts about yourself.
2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears 
3. Describe your relationship with your spouse. 
4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.
5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?
6. If you could have three wishes, what would you wish for?
7. What is your dream job, and why?
8. What are 5 passions you have?
9. List 10 people who have influenced you and describe how.
10. Describe your most embarrassing moment.
11. Describe 10 pet peeves you have.
12. Describe a typical day in your current life.
13. What’s the hardest part of growing up?
14. Describe 5 and weaknesses strengths you have.
15. Describe when you knew your spouse was the one or how I fell in love.
16. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?
17. What is the thing you most wish you were great at?
18. What do you think your spouse loves most about you?
19. How did you feel the moment you became a parent?
20. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.
21. Describe your relationship with your parents.
22. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?
23. What’s your favorite holiday and why?
24. What’s your favorite and least favorite thing about parenthood?
25. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be and what would you eat?
26. What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?
27. What is your favorite part of your body and why?
28. What’s your favorite quality in your spouse?
29. What are your hopes and dreams for your prosperity?
30. List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.


So For Day 1- Here are my 20 Facts

1. Ham and Cheese Sandwiches.   I have a slight obsession with ham and cheese sandwiches. They're absolutely one of my favorite meals and I can thank you Papa ( my dad) for that.  When i was little he and I used to enjoy some of the best sandwiches ever known to man.  
2. I have small feet, and I'm really embarrassed about how small they are so I buy tennis shoes bigger than the size I need so that my feet look "normal" for my height.  
3. I love love LOVE to dance.  Everyday I dance, even if it's just a little bit ( and even if Jaxon doesn't want to)
4. When I'm stressed out, I cook… or bake… but If I'm stressed I'm usually in the kitchen.  
5. Speaking of cooking, I took my first cooking class when I was 6 years old…and I've loved cooking ever since.   I promise to teach you to cook (and I love having you help me out while I'm cooking)
6. I love to write… which you're probably figuring out by now.  
7. I hope that someday we will get to live out of town and will be able to have lots of animals on a little piece of land.
8. When I was a senior in high school I won Supreme Grand Champion in the County Stock Show with my goat, that I named Jag. 
9. I also had a bottle fed goat named Pheonix whose mother died in a fire. She slept in a bin next to my bed, wore diapers, and even road in the truck with me to school everyday. She was super sweet.
10. I love to have my toes popped.   
11.  I really hate running, and working out all together, but I'm trying to enjoy it more. 
12. I love to read
13. Camping is my favorite summer time activity (and I only like really roughing it, by camping in a tent)
14. I love to sing. but I especially love when you sing with me.
15. I always wanted a BIG family, but regardless of how big or small our family is, it'll be full of love.
16. I love your Aunt Keke and Koko more than they'll ever know…be nice to your siblings if you ever have any…they'll be your very best friends. 
17. I love to drive when I'm upset. Windows down, and the music loud, but since you came along, drives with quiet music and the windows up are just fine with me, too.
18. I love fruit but I really love to share it with you.
19. I love to look at the stars. 
20. I love to travel, but I try to avoid touristy activities. I really like to learn about the culture of an area and see Local spots.


Ok, well that was much harder than I realized, and as usual, I write way too much when I'm supposed to just write short facts.   So I'm signing off :)


Peace, Love and Facts-

Kayla 

Jaxon Lately

     Sweet Jaxon is 18 months old!  He weighs 26 lbs, and I really don't know how tall he is because he hasn't had his appointment yet so yeah... haha I'll fill that in later.  He is absolutely in love with Buzz Lightyear and brings me the remote every morning after breakfast and says "Buzz, Buzz?!"  He has a stuffed Buzz and Woody that he carries around everywhere. He wears 18-24 month clothes, but he's taken after his momma, and his booty is starting to fill his jeans faster than his waist is;  so we're hitting a little close to 24 months lately.  Every night, he has to sleep with his Texas Rangers pillow pets, his glow-worm (that he's hated since I bought it), his Night Light animal, Buzz, Woody, Nemo, his Scentsy frog, and his sock bunny.  Needless to say, his little bed is absolutely packed to the rim.  He's down to one nap a day around 12:30 and only naps until about 2:30 or 3:00.  He has a pretty large vocabulary; Buzz, Momma, Dadda, Ace, Eyes, thank you, uh oh, Uh huh, Yes, No, Bye-Bye, Hi, Puppy, Baby, Bubba, book, Nose, Bite, Boom ( thanks to His Auntie Koko), Night Night, Nemo, Ball, See, That, this, and he's a really really sweet kiss giver!  He loves to give big ole bear hugs, and play ball. He and Ace are pretty inseparable, which is funny, because the day I brought Ace home, Ace felt the need to curl up with him and nap as often as he could.  Ace and Ranger are two of the craziest Dogs I have ever had, and their little personalities (BIG personalities?) seem to show themselves more and more everyday.
     
       Being that Jaxon has reached his second "half birthday" that can only mean that Christmas and Graduation recently came to pass also.  Graduation was absolutely one of the most exciting times of my entire life.  It was such a blessing to be surrounded by my family and friends at pinning, graduation and my graduation party.  Sadly, I almost thought this day would never come.  It seemed so far out of reach, from finding out I was pregnant at the end of my first semester, to struggling with Adult Health II, and struggling through leaving my sweet baby boy for 144 hours to complete my residency.  I couldn't have done it without all of the support and encouragement and love I received over the past 2.5 years.  Since graduation, I have been on the job search, and had a couple of offers, but nothing that I have accepted just yet.  I refuse to settle for something I'm not 100% committed to, so I'm holding out for a position at Community Medical Center on the PCU, if it's not in the cards, I know life will sort itself out.  I still have to take boards (which is a whole different story seeing as where there have been some issues with ASU/TxBON but I'm definitely ready to have that in my rearview mirror as well.

     December is always a busy time at our house, and as soon as graduation was over it was time for Christmas festivities to begin.  The weekend after graduation, we went to Baird to spend Christmas with Eddie's family at the ranch.  As usual, it was a pretty rowdy fun time.  Nothing beats a big family with lots of laughs, and great food.  When we got home, it was time for Christmas Eve at our house, and Christmas Day at Tanya and Tobin's and My Dad's.  Jaxon is a pretty lucky little guy, he got some really neat gifts and has already made good use of all of them!  He got a slide that he loves to play on, a battery powered four-wheeler that he drives (backwards most of the time) all over the house and the yard, lots of blocks, clothes, and a new toy crate.  He made out like a bandit, to say the least.

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season, and I hope that 2014 blesses everyone with joy, prosperity, and love.

Until Next Time,
Peace, Love and Resolutions

After Pinning with my favorite guys

(check out Jax's adorable tie!)

My handsome guys at Graduation 

Graduation Picture with Jax and Daddy 

Pictures from our attempt to take Christmas Card pictures this year…. 

 and a couple of my graduation pictures...