Well I would NEVER….

      Almost two years ago, I was 22, a newlywed and fighting with my first symptom of pregnancy….morning sickness.  I was exhausted, excited and nauseas.  I also wasn't ready to share my big news with the world because I wasn't ready for the snide comments that come from anything good happening in someones' life.   Prior to being pregnant I was "that girl", you know, the one that said things like, "when I have kids, they will never…." or "When I have kids, I will never…"   I was the type of girl that made comments like, "must be something in the water…" to put it lightly, I was a little full of myself.  I thought I had all the answers.    When I did finally announce my pregnancy on Facebook, within 10 minutes I saw the "everyone's getting pregnant, must be in the water…glad its not me".  My heart sank…. how could someone, undermine my pregnancy with something so snide.  To this day, I still think of the girl that said it with a little bit of hurt, maybe its petty, but that made me realize how much of an impact people's words have on us.
        Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago:  I'm a member of a "secret" group on Facebook for Mother's across the world to share and collaborate on how to solve their maternal dilemmas. Everything from choosing to cloth diaper, to problems with our significant others to sharing funny stories about how our baby is the most amazing thing we have ever encountered.   For the most part, I like  LOVE being a part of the group. I love the stories, the encouragement, and being able to relate to someone that just understands.  One thing I've noticed though, is that there is a growing incidence of "mom bashing".  Now that I am a mother myself, I realize I don't have all the answer. and I probably never will.   I recently posted about Jaxon having a rash, one I had been watching obsessively, and treating every way I knew possible.  I decided to seek out some advice from my group of moms.  I thought, "well I've looked at this rash a million times and I've obviously convinced myself I know what it is, but maybe I'm just seeing what I want to".  I received some encouragement, and then… like a knife through the heart I got " Well, I would have already taken my child to the pediatrician".  Oh.  I thought,  I must officially be one of THOSE moms.  (You know, the ones that are too lazy or too stupid or just absolutely too selfish to take their child to the doctor).  My heart sank, and my head started reeling, and I was automatically nauseas. I was convinced my child probably was going to stop breathing and I was going to be completely and utterly regretting not being one of those mothers who rushes her child to the pediatrician for a scraped knee.  I KNOW my child, and I know my educational background… deep down inside I knew that Jaxon just had a rash…and thats why I hadn't taken him to the doctor.  I knew how to care for the type of rash he had, but I was just frustrated with the fact that it hadn't just completely gone away.  (Trust me, had my child been acting anything less that "normal" straight to the doctor he would have gone…but as he's running through the house playing basketball, and "tickling" me… I really think he's doing ok… sorry for the rabbit trail).   So why did some "strangers" words have to make me feel so inadequate?
      Another example I can think of is when Jaxon was really little, an extremely healthy friend from high school had posted about how people who feed their children food from McDonalds "Don't care about their health and should be able to be parents at all…"  WHAT?! Now, Jaxon was far too young to have eaten anything solid, but how could someone tell me that if I choose to feed my child something unhealthy that I should lose my (or any parent's) right as a parent?!  Doesn't anyone think that because I  aided in the conception, carrying, development and birth of this beautiful baby boy that is part of my DNA that I know how to care for him? I get that some people just genuinely do not care care for their children, but I do, and for that, I think I deserve a LITTLE credit.
      Facebook seems to be the root of a lot of the inadequacy I think that we all face as parents.  Facebook, Pinterest, Society… they all play a large part.  As mothers, parents, women, we're all told to look a certain way, cook a certain way, keep a spotless house with chevron walls and home made 200 calorie meals.  We should all work out until we have tightly toned bodies.  Our children should all read before kindergarten, and should never play with iPhones at the dinner table, they should all do chores by 18 months and we should plan weekly date nights with our perfect husbands.   I don't know about yall, but my life isn't quite that cookie cutter.  I rarely have time to get in a good work out, I rarely get date nights with my husband, I can't paint chevron walls in my house to save my life, I have let my child play with an iPhone at dinner JUST SO I COULD EAT.  I've been that mom with a screaming child in a restaurant.  We eat fast food sometimes, my house looks like a goldfish, or toy factory exploded.  I don't buy all organic, all natural foods, and quite frankly, I don't like the taste of the majority of "healthy foods."
      As a mother, I don't think we ever feel "good enough" or like we have all the answers (and if you do, you're probably doing something wrong (wink*) From the moment I found out I was pregnant  I began becoming so fixated on what society expects from Mothers.  But, the truth is… is that there isn't just one expectation…there are a dozen of them.  Some people judge you if you leave your child with a sitter for a night on the town, others tell you you HAVE to make date nights a priority.  Some people tell you that breast feeding and cloth diapering are the ONLY way to care for your child, while circumcision, spanking and bed sleeping are neglect and abuse.  As mothers, we are pulled in a million different directions, the expectations we are held to (and that we hold our selves to) is far beyond our reach. We can't please everyone, and no one else knows our child like we do.  Why do we feel the need to rant and rave about mothers who do things differently from us? There's science out there to prove every fact we want to prove…thats the beauty of life, difference.  So why can't we accept and RESPECT  each other for our differences.  Why do we have to belittle, and attack and put down anyone who isn't like us?  There's no perfection in motherhood.  So why do we spend so much time letting other people influence our ideas and actions.  Why as mothers, aren't we building each other up? Why aren't we encouraging each other and reminding each other than we're all doing the best thing we can, why can't we give advice suggestions lovingly?   I hope that I can be an example of that type of mother, one that teaches lovingly, one that shares lovingly, one that lives lovingly, and for that… I will declare myself successful.  


Until Next Time,
Peace, Love and Love.

Better Late than Never?

Well, I can honestly say that I am terribly behind in my blogging…. I had high hopes of writing Jaxon this eloquent blog of how amazing the first year of his life had been for our family, and I failed miserably when I didn't ever find the time to do it…. I had quite a bit of anxiety with the upcoming school year and between party planning, traveling, 4th of July and numerous family reunions, time just slipped away.  I will say though, that Jaxon just continues to exude joy and innocence.  So I'll update on him first!

Jaxon is 16 months and 2 days today!  I have no clue where the time has gone but man has it flown!  He's a walking, talking, hilarious little character.  He has one of the most entertaining personalities.  Some of his favorite words are "see!" "puppy" (puppau) and "sit!"   He answers all of his questions with a nod and "uh-huhm" or  a clear shake of his little noggin to tell us No!.  He says "dank too" (Thank you) and we can occasionally get a PLEASE out of him…he still loves to hold my hand when he walks, but when he's found something he wants to explore, he takes off.  He loves to "drive cars" and throw balls, his puppies are the absolute best part of his day, and he's starting to become quite the little dancer.   He LOVES to give big hugs, but he's not as gracious with kiss (unless he's blowing them and telling you, Buh BYE! He's in size 18-24 size clothes and though they are "baggy" they're the only thing long enough for his tall self!  He's got teeth coming in right and left so I can't really say how many he has.  He is absolutely infatuated with Finding Nemo but also enjoys Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, Rio, Monster's Inc, Despicable Me, and Cars.  (Mater is his favorite by far!)  Some of his favorite foods are cheeseburgers, pizza, grapes, bananas, oranges, peaches, and the occasional Carmel Apple Spice from Starbucks for those really cold days.  He loves to play at the park, and loves to climb. For Halloween he was Charlie Brown (and by far the cutest Charlie Brown I have ever seen!) and we took him Trick-Or-Treating around his Papa's neighborhood.  He's growing and changing by the day, just like our love for him.

Jay and I just recently celebrated two years of being married, and though we didn't get to celebrate with the romantic weekend we had planned, we enjoyed a family trip to San Antonio to walk in the Light the Night Walk for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society followed by a trip to the Alamo, Natural Bridge Wildlife Reserve, and a delicious meal at Mamacita's and Alamo City Cafe.  It was definitely a great weekend.  On our actual anniversary, I had worked the night before, and the night of so I only saw Jay for a total of 10 mins (I brought him breakfast burritos).  It was definitely a little hard on us, but we have more than celebrated these past two years with lots of memories and laughs along the way!   You may have noticed I said I "worked" well, truth be told I'm finishing my Senior Residency for nursing school, so I'm really not "working" (seeing is where I'm not being paid).  Our senior residency consists of twelve 12-hour shifts spent at a chosen facility with a chosen preceptor for one on one clinical experience.  I started out on Nights and worked 8 shifts with one preceptor at Community Medical Center's PCU (it's a step down unit, when people come out of ICU thats the place they go until they can be moved to a lesser acute unit, or can go home) my last 4 shifts were done on Days with a Different preceptor, and I finish this week!   That means Graduation is right around the corner!   It's definitely exciting and I cannot wait to be done.  I will definitely miss my classmates but Nursing School is taking a toll on my sanity!  Graduation is Dec 14 at 10:00 am at the Junell Center, and my Pinning Ceremony is on Dec 13 at 6:00 pm! I am SO SO SO excited.  Our families are throwing me a celebratory Lunch on Saturday and It will be so nice to get to celebrate with all of the wonderful people that have helped this dream become a reality.  I know this blog is short, and a little bit chaotic, but it's better than nothing!  I'm adding some pictures from the past few months!  Enjoy

Until Next Time,
Peace, Love and Mortarboards

Jaxon's First Birthday Party

Jay, Me, and Jaxon At his Birthday Party 

Enjoying his Cake 

Watkins Family Reunion 2013

Meet the Cousins, 2013 

Light the Night Walk, San Antonio, TX 2013 

Natural Bridge Wildlife Ranch, 2013 

Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin, Halloween

Jaxon's First Birthday Photoshoot  

Jaxon Henry, July 20130 

July 2013 

February has come, and gone....

     Holy cow!  My monthly write ups a lacking, to say the least.  I guess I missed Jaxon's 7 month write up, and Saturday he'll be 8 months old!  Where is the time going?!?  He's quite the little stinker these days.  He has definitely figured out how to get what he wants.  I loves to pout and whine to me and then laugh it off when I get on to him.  I have a feeling the next 20 years are going to be pretty entertaining.  He started waving "bye-bye" and he already seems to be a Lane Frost fan, (he waves with both hands, at the same time).  Jay and I seem to think thats pretty precious.
   We had some special company over the past month and a half.  Chelsie, Tara, Leighton and Ryker all came to visit us for a day.  We made a big pallet in the floor, and watched movies, like we did when Tara, Chelsie and I were little.  We were so excited to have them come visit us and see our house!   We don't get to see them nearly as often as we would like to!  Jaxon also got to meet his Great Uncle Michael for the first time, ( my Mom's brother) and his Great-Great Grandma Marge.   That was an amazing treat!  That's the first time that our family has been together like that.  5 generations is pretty special and I don't know how many other people can say they've ever gotten that chance.  It was definitely special for all of us.  We enjoyed getting to see Great Uncle Davis again too!  He's always a lot of fun.  I definitely enjoyed getting to spend some time with my Uncle Michael.  I haven't seen hims since the summer my parents separated, so it was WELL over due.
     We celebrated his first Valentine's Day with an evening at his first rodeo with Mommy, Daddy, Papaw, Grandy, Keke and Kylie.  He loved the rodeo!  We also had our first swim lesson, made some homemade Whoopie Pies for Daddy and exchanged little gifts between the 3 of us.  Jaxon got a glowworm, in hopes that he might sleep better if he has something to snuggle.  We call it Bug.  He loves to give it good night kisses, and always saves a few for Mommy and Daddy, too.  Have I mentioned how big he's getting?!?  He's now wearing size 3 diapers, weighs 19 lbs, and wears 9 month clothes.  He still eats every 3-4 hours, sometimes he goes a little longer.  We're still following the Baby Led Weaning technique and we love it.  His new favorites this month are oranges, bananas, waffles, crackers, vanilla wafers, chicken, celery, and he always wants to share my yogurt with me. He's even had a few bites of fish (yes, I know he's not supposed to eat fish, but it's obvious he didn't have an allergy to it!   He's still not crawling yet, but he scoots, and rolls all over the floor.  If you put him down for longer than 2 minutes you better get ready to have to chase his silly self across the room!
     I mentioned swim lessons earlier, what a hoot!  We were one of 4 "couplets" in the class, but now it looks like we're one of two.  It's a mommy and me class that we attend twice a week through the American Red Cross (Shout out to my ARC homies!)  at ASU.  The water is usually uncomforably cold but he absolute loves swimming.  So far he has learned to kick his feet and dunk his face in the water.  He also practices floating, and blowing bubbles.  He prefers to blow bubbles 90% of the time.  I really enjoy the interaction we get to share at swim classes.  We're hoping that they come in super handy when we go on our first big family vacation in 12 days!   For Spring Break, we will be spending 8 days and 7 nights in Sunny Cancun, Mexico!   I am so excited to get to take our little guy on his first plane ride, his first beach experience, and our first family vacation!  We'll be staying at the same place Jay and I spent our honeymoon, so that's pretty exciting, too!   I don't foresee getting to do the same activities we did on our honeymoon, but a week at the beach with my boys sounds perfect, none the less!
     Speaking of beaches, Jay and I have been on weight watchers for about 6 weeks now!   We have both done pretty good.  It's a struggle somedays, but we're trying more and more to be healthy, active, and fit.  So far we've both lost about 12 lbs.  Somedays we really just want to call it quits and veg out, but we've found so many new foods that we like thanks to being more conscious about what we eat.  In fact, tonight we're having some kind of stuff salmon.  I'm really anxious to see if I actually like it, because I'm not much of a fish eater.  I'm super proud of Jay for going on this journey with me, and for being so strong even when it's easier to be lazy!   We're excited to see where we'll be at the end of our year!  
       Speaking of the end of the year, at the end of this year it looks like I'll actually be graduating....finally!   This semester seems to be going so much better for me!  I have a much more clear mind, I feel so much more confident, and I feel like I have FINALLY found some wonderful people to surround myself with.  I do miss some of my old classmates, but I feel like this class may be a better fit for me.  It's smaller, with more focus on each individuals success, everyone works as a team, and treats everyone like a family.  There are times that we all get a little irked with each other, but it seems to be supportive day in and day out.  I never feel like I'm "the dunce" anymore, and thats a really big improvement for me.  I've enjoyed making new friends, and thats been a blessing in itself.  It's hard some days to not be bitter about not graduating in May, but I know God has a much better plan for me. Speaking of plans, I just applied for a PRN position as a Pediatric Nursing Assistant at Shannon Medical Center.  If I get it, it could definitely open some doors to becoming a Labor and Delivery Nurse once I graduate.  It's only a "as needed" position, so I won't have to leave Jax too often, and I don't think that it will affect school at all. We'll just have to see what happens with that though!   I hope to write again soon, so that I can tell all about our big trip.  My little monster just woke up from his nap, so I better get to snuggling that sweet boy while I can!

I attempted to get some Valentine's Day pictures of my little stinker, but it wasn't the best day for that. 

Leighton, Jax, Chels, and Ryker. 

My mom's family!  Mom, Grandpa, Kourtney, Grandma Marge, Grandma Darlene, Karlee, Jay, Me Davis, Uncle Michael and Jax! 

Until Next Time,

Peace, Love, and Slobbery Kisses


The Moores

Happy Half-Birthday Jaxon

Holy Cow!  Time has FLOWN since my last entry.  In fact, it's been two months.  (Jaxon, when you get big and read this, please forgive me for skipping your 5th month entry, the thought crossed my mind a MILLION times but we have been SO busy!   I promise to try and not leave anything out....)

     I guess I should start at your 5 month milestone.   You are definitely the happiest baby I have EVER been around.  Nothing brightens my days more than watching you smile the biggest grin anyone has ever seen.  You started "scooting" backwards at 5 months old.  You try so hard to crawl but we haven't quite coordinated the legs and the arms just yet, but you're getting there.  You had your first couple of dances with homemade baby food, and rice cereal... you loved them, but you wanted to try to feed yourself. You almost always try to steal my spoon or fork at the dinner table and always want to drink out of my cup...quite frankly you're just too big for your britches, (but thats ok, because I think you're wonderful).  You celebrated your first Thanksgiving becoming quite the little traveler.  As usual, we had Thanksgiving on Wednesday at Grumpa's and on Thursday morning we drove to Baird to have Thanksgicing with Daddy's family.  There were SO many people there, and everyone absolutely adored you.  Don't worry, I let you try just about anything and everything on my plate. Daddy had to work the Friday after, but me, you and Grammaw did a little shopping.  That night we put up our Christmas tree. You weren't too interested in getting the tree up until I got the lights on.  You talked and played the entire time though.  Such a sweet memory that I'll always hold dear.  The weekend before Finals Daddy and I took a break to take you and Nana and Papa to Christmas at Old Fort Concho. We ate pancakes with Santa, and then walked around to see all the wonderful exhibits.  You went to your first petting Zoo, but I knew you'd attempt to scarf down some of their food, so you only looked from the fence.  We loved the little piggies.   After Thanksgiving it was back to school for Mommy, unfortunately, I didn't pass one of my classes this semester. It all but broke my spirit.   The day of my final I just laid in bed and snuggled with you... I knew if your daddy couldn't be home to hold me together, you were about the next best thing.  You kept grabbing my face with your tiny hands and covering my cheeks with sugars.  I've found lots of silver lining in God's new plan for our lives.  Oh! speaking of God's plans, Daddy and I made the executive decision to dedicate ourselves to raising you in a Godly manner.  It was a pretty tough charge on our part, but we knew God was using us to help you to become something wonderful.  Your dedication was on Dec 16, at 10:00 am at PaulAnn Baptist Church.  Grandad, Jojo, Marly, Josh, Kenzie, Maddie, Landry, Tanya, Tobin, Nick, Tina, Mason, Keke, Gammaw and Lynn were all there to support the three of us.  You definitely were the most handsome little guy up there.  We received a great little certificate and a baby bible just for you!   I try to read your stories out of it, or the other books you have every evening.  Needless to say, sometimes I don't get to, and it makes me wish I could add a couple of extra hours to the day just so I could squeeze those times in.     Since that weekend our lives have been so busy!   Daddy, Mommy, Keke, Koko, Gran D and Grumpa all took you to your first Cowboy's game on Dec 22, and guess what?! You got to sit in a Suite!   I know that probably doesn't mean much to you now, but it was definitely a neat experience!   You slept through most of the game, but you definitely shared some peach cobbler with grumpa.   That morning when your Daddy and I were getting ready to go to the game you were so fussy!  The only way we could get you to stop was by propping you up in your play pen in front of the TV so you could watch Sports Center.  Don't worry I got pictures.

     After the Cowboy's game came Christmas.  You definitely had a blast with all of your wonderful family and the neat gifts you got. We celebrated Christmas Eve here at our house, Nana, Papa, Keke, Koko, Gammaw and Lynn all came over to eat lots of yummy food and exchange gifts.  You were great entertainment for all of us.  You were so silly.  Oh, and I forgot to mention, Daddy and I got you a new puppy right before Christmas, she's super sweet, and she thinks you're the bees knees! Her name is Milee, and she loves to lick your toes!  You think its the funniest thing you've ever witnessed, too!  But back to the holidays, we spent Christmas Day at Tanya and Tobins, and then at Grumpa's.  You got lots of neat gifts there too!  Afterwards it was back to Gammaw's for a short visit and then home to catch some zzz's!
     Right around Christmas you started sleeping in your own bed, in your own Big Boy room.  It's been tough for me to not have you right next to my side of the bed, but I am so proud of all your accomplishments.  You make your daddy and I very proud.  You usually sleep from about 9:00-4:15.  We start our bedtime routine with a bath around 7:00, and then we play, snuggle, eat and get rocked to sleep.  You always hum along anytime anyone sings any lullabies to you.  It's the sweetest thing ever!  Well, I think everything you do is sweet, but who's to say otherwise?  You are definitely the greatest thing to ever become a part of our lives.  It is unbelievable how fast these first 6 months have flown.
      Speaking of 6 months, today you had your 6 month check up.  You weight 16 lbs 12 oz and were 25.25" long. You're a good growing boy!  You also had to get 4 shots today, and you barely made a fuss!  You're a tough little guy, your Daddy says you get it from me, but I told him we are strong because God gave us a tough man to lean on, we make a good team, your Daddy and me.  Like I already said, these past 6 months have just flown by. We have all learned very much.  You have brought so much joy into our lives and I thank God for every passing second I get to be a part of his miracle.  You've almost made it a whole year of life, and I know there are so many more memories to be made.  I wish I could freeze just a little bit of everyday and keep it locked away for when you're too big for our daily snuggles.  I know we have a world of firsts ahead, and wonderful memories to be made.  May you always know how much I truly truly love you.



I guess this entry needed to be more of a letter to my little guy than an update for everyone else.  I think I covered every little detail I could.  Many of you know and some of you don't, but I failed a class this semester (not by much, but anything less than a 70 in Nursing school is failing, and they don't round up, on anything) I have been reaccepted into the program and am still trudging through.  The end is in site.  I know God has a plan for me and I don't think that it's to give up.  I mentioned our new dog Milee earlier, she's a sweetie.  We definitely love her.  She's part Shih-tzu and part Daschund.  She and Jaxon and Ranger are all a house full of laughs.  As many of you know, Jay received a promotion before we got engaged and started his new position a year ago this month, I know it was an adventure for him to overcome some challenges he faced but I have to brag at how proud I am of him for meeting his goal for this year, in fact he surpassed it!  I always knew he could do it but now that he knows I know he's proud of himself too!  I'm a lucky woman to have such a hard working husband!

Daddy and Jax- December 2012 

Daddy, Mommy, Jax, Keke and Koko

Opening presents on Christmas Eve 

Opening Presents 

Our Christmas Eve Picture 

You absolutely LOVED the Christmas Lights.  

Your First Thanksgiving 

Pancake Breakfast with Santa

Fort Concho with Nana and Pap 

At the Cowboy's game in our Suite 

At the Cowboy's Game, Dec 23, 2012 

Until Next Time

Peace, Love and Moments